Too many of my morning start like this
Voice: Hey, James....
Me: *Snort* Huh?
Voice: Jaaaaaaaaaames, wake uuuuuuuuup.
Me: *Nonsensical words, I think the word "rabbit" was in there*
Me: Ah! What?
Voice: I have a lot of things to discuss with you. I thought since you'd been asleep for half the morning, now might be a good time.
Me: What--? Dude, Brain, it's four in the morning. Can't this wait?
Voice: No, now is perfect. I've got so much to say.
Me: No. Stop. Don't. Seriously, Brain, I'm going back to sleep.
Voice: So, I've been working on this plan on how to dominate the world. Want to hear it?
Me: Why would I want to take over the world? That sounds like a lot of extra work I don't want right now. Plus, I can barely keep a goldfish and house plants alive, why would anybody want me ruling the world?
Voice: Well, if we discuss it now, you can think on it and when you've got the spare time and motivation, BAM! World domination.
Me: Not interested.
Voice: France would fall first.
Me: Okay, I'm a little interested. However, I'm still more interested in sleep.
Voice: Okay, well, I've got other ideas. Want to hear them?
Me: Oh my gosh, Brain. I just want to sleep! Now leave me alone or, I swear on everything I'm worth, I will beat myself over the head with a hammer until you SHUT. UP. AND. LET. ME. SLEEP!
Me: Aaahhhhh, sleep. I'll just turn the pillow over to the cool side and--
Voice: --I think I'm going to call your bluff. I don't think yo--
Me: Fine! I'm up, I'm up. Let me pee first.
Me: *Two minutes later* Okay, Brain. What did you want to tell me?
Voice: *Makes bodily fluid sound*
Me: What was that? Did you toot?
Voice: Toot? Don't be such a girly-man. I farted. Yes, I had a brain fart, and I forgot everything. Come to think of it, it might not have been too important in the first place. You can go back to sleep now.